Abigail sent this letter to us and we wanted to share it with you.
Today, I sat alone in my apartment, listening to the silence. My son was at a friend’s house. A picture on the wall was crooked, but that was okay. The bowl from my oatmeal was still in the sink, but that was okay. I knew that if I walked down the hall into the bedroom, I would see my unmade bed, but that was okay.
Why was this okay? Because for years, it was never okay. I made the bed the wrong way. I did the dishes wrong. I mowed the lawn too short. And worse—I was called every horrible name you could think of. But what broke me was being called a horrible mother. Although my ex-husband never wanted to help with parenting, he was happy to point out all the ways I was failing.
Getting connected to an Advocate and support groups at New Beginnings was the start of a new life for me. The years of emotional and verbal abuse had taken their toll: I felt worthless as a human being. I’ll always remember the first day I attended support group. We were asked to make a list of things we liked about ourselves, good qualities. I started at the page for a long time. After a minute, another person in the group leaned over, pointed at my blank page, and said, “You can write survivor at the top.”
I met so many inspiring women during my time at New Beginnings. We came from so many different backgrounds—there were stay-at-home moms, a lawyer, a professor, a nanny, a hairdresser—but we were connected by the simple fact that we were there together, trying to make a better life for ourselves and our families.